Sweet Sleep

Last night we didn't get home until after 10. And this happens more than it probably should. No wonder she doesn't sleep all night in her bed. We have worked out a deal that if she stays in her bed all night for 7 days she will get a fish. That was almost a week ago. And it hasn't happened.

I think now she said I don't have to lay down with her at night. And she will sleep in a sleeping bag on the floor when she comes in in the middle of the night. Renegotiating the fish deal.

When we were traveling many years ago, she fell asleep on the couch of the hotel room, with her booty straight up in the air. I guess the bonus of this is, she can fall asleep anywhere. I love her . . .

Times Are A Changin'

(EG asleep on the couch)

So I woke up this morning, for the fifth night in a row, without an EG in my bed.  Many years ago, when she would wake up in the middle of the night and make the trek to our room, I would get up and go lay back down with her until she was fast asleep in her own bed.

But, as I got older and the nights got shorter, when she came into our room (usually anywhere between 2-5), I would just let her stay.  I know, I know, we could discuss my parenting skills and how important it is for children to sleep in their own beds etc.  I have done all of that with the other three.  And now it is my baby.  I feel there are different rules, to some degree, for the baby.

I was certain there would be no other newborns in the house so I didn't have to worry about that.  Every single night she would go to bed, in her own bed, without complaint.  Many nights she would crawl into our bed and I wouldn't even know she was there until morning.  When hubby leaves for work between 5 and 5:30 he always does a kid check.  Making sure everyone is where they are suppose to be.  A couple of times he didn't even know she was in our bed until he went to check hers and she wasn't there.  Imagine his suprise!

Anyway, last night was the fifth night in a row that baby girl slept in in her own bed.  All night.  And she is darn proud of herself too.  It is one of those bitter sweet moments.  My baby isn't a baby.  Oh, I am sure there will be nights she will still come in.  And maybe this is just some fluke.  But, it has given me pause to realize they do grow up.  Even when they are baby.

The baby isn't so much a baby anymore . . . 

In the Middle of the Night

My sister and I were talking on Sunday about what it is like to be a new mom.  I mean a brand new mom.  I so vividly remember the whole experience of bring Nature Girl home.  My whole concept of life changed.  I no longer was living for just myself or my husband.

I also very distinctly remember my response to not getting enough sleep.  OK not getting any sleep.  My pediatrician, at the time, told me I would probably not get another full night's sleep until my baby girl was about 8.  The thought of that was terrifying to me.  And that wasn't even considering any more children after the first one.

I needed my sleep.

I am pretty sure I have slept about a handful of nights since then.  Well, that is probably an exaggeration to make my point.  But, not too far from the truth!  It is amazing how 4 babies in about 7 1/2 years changes your perspective on sleep.  Actually my perspective on a lot of things.  But, that is another post altogether.

I say all this because, as many of you know, my 4 year old appears in my bed most nights.  Usually between the hours of 2 and 4AM.  Most nights I notice but there are some nights that I have no idea she is there until I wake up.

A time or two in the past year or so she will start a conversation with me in the middle of the night.  Tuesday's middle of the night's conversation went something like this:

"Mama?"

"Yes, EG?  Do you have to go to the bathroom?"

"No, mama.  Did you know that Boop cheats at cards?"

"I have heard that."

In my first few years of parenting: 1) this would have never happened - there would have never been a child in my bed and  2)  if one of my children woke me at 4 AM to accuse a sibling of anything, I am pretty sure I would not have been amused.

Because I am at the end of having babies in the house (first time I have had a four year old with out a baby/toddler - post for another day), I have realized how fleeting these moments are.  If I had realized just a tad bit sooner that my babies grow up faster than I can even imagine, I might have had many more captivating conversations with all of my children in the middle of the night.

I know one thing for certain, I no longer am annoyed at being woke up in the middle of the night.  I also realize that I no longer need a full nights sleep.  I might get some of those when my babies are grown and gone.  I am learning to cherish all of their moments.

Especially those in the middle of the night . . .

Poor Thing

EG fell sometimes falls asleep in the middle of my nightly reading.  It is no wonder she can be so grumpy during the day.  I should make her go to bed earlier but she wants to stay up and listen with everyone else. Yes, she is spoiled . . .

How She Rolls (or Sleeps as It Were)

Sometimes I feel bad for her.  The other kids had very strict bedtimes.  Everyone was in bed at 8:30 when they were her age.  (Well, there was a little wiggle room for Boop because I do remember him falling asleep on the couch as well.)  That's just the way it was.  But, as the older kids get older, and they stay up a little later, so does she.

We still read almost every night.  And EG usually stays up with us.  But, many times this is what happens.  She is sound asleep, in what seems to me to be the most uncomfortable positions.  I guess it helps she is young and flexible.

I usually pick her up and put her in bed.  And she never stirs (until about 2AM when she joins us in our bed.)

Sleep is overrated, right . . .

Sleep

When I was first married, one of my bosses gave me a piece of advice.  It went something like this "Don't let your kids sleep in bed with you.  If they wake up in the middle of the night and come in your room, have them sleep in sleeping bag on the floor."

At the time, I wasn't real sure of the advice.  Of course, 11 years and 4 kids later, I totally get it.  It is a rare night that we don't have a visitor.  Majority of the time it is EG.  But, when it isn't EG it is one of the others.

EG has never been a good sleeper.  The reason why is, I just needed sleep so we developed some bad habits, early.  I would lay down with her or sleep on the couch with her.  I didn't care where we were (neither did she) I just wanted sleep.

Three and a half years later, my thought process is much the same, I just want to sleep.  When we moved her into a "big girl bed" which consists of a mattress on the floor of the girls room she slept through the night a couple of nights.

Then she started waking up again and depending on the time, like if it was after 3 or 4, she would crawl in bed with us because hubby and I would be getting up in a couple hours any way.  If she came in before then, I would walk her back to her room and lay down with her for about an hour.  She would fall asleep (and I would too only to wake up an hour later to go back to bed.)

Not an ideal situation, but it was working for us.  Then one night, I just decided if and when she came into our room I was just going to let her sleep with us.  (When the bigger kids do, they sleep on the floor, which is very rare.)  Everything I have read and been taught and have done was never THAT.  I am a huge proponent of having kids sleep in their own beds, all night, every night.

But, I also liked the sleep.

I started to think what am I going to do about this?  A habit is formed.  An expectation is now developed. I am doing the exact thing I said I would never do.  Then, two or three early mornings ago, in the darkness of our room, while my baby girl was trying to settle herself down to go back to sleep, she reached out and held my hand.

She is my baby.  I am certain there will be none after her.  Her young years will go by so fast and when I look back, the nights she cuddled with me and held my hand will be but a sweet memory.  Right or wrong, it is the way it is.  And most nights, I cherish the time . . .

Sleep

I hate to say anything, but, for the last two nights EG has slept through the night! In fact, we have had no little people in our bedroom, at all, for the last two nights. First time in weeks and weeks and weeks. Now, this is how it all happened.

We finally got the mattress we ordered for EG to sleep on. It fits under our existing bunk beds in the girls' room. We bought her a matching sheet and the big girls slide it out at night and push it in in the morning. So that is where she is sleeping now. I guess she just likes being with some one. Little Mama has offered that if she does wake up at night, EG can sleep with her. (So typical of Little Mama! She is going to make a fantastic wife and mother!)

Boop finally got to sleep back in his own room after two years. At first, he didn't like it. He kind of fussed and wanted me to stay with him. But, after some cajoling and leaving a light or two on, he fell asleep. He also has slept through the night!

I know nothing lasts forever. And I am not counting on this being the end to midnight visitors. But, it sure has been nice to wake up all by myself in the morning (well, with hubby too).

I will confess, though, one thing, I am a little sad. Part of the excuse of letting EG sleep with me was that she wouldn't be a baby forever. She would grow up and need me less and less. And, because she is the last, I was willing to let some of the bad habits slide.

No matter how hard I try, they all just keep growing up. So, so not prepared for it . . . .

Oh No, Not Yet

EG is trying so hard to give up her nap. It has been almost a week since she has slept in the afternoon. She needs the sleep. I need the break.

I love, love, love her but quiet time/rest time/nap time is a must for me to make it through the day.

I have moved her from her crib to the twin bed at nap time so she won't call for me the entire hour. She will lay in the bed, play with her blankets, books, stuffed animals and pillows. She doesn't get out. Which really is a surprise to me.

She doesn't sleep either. I can't make her sleep and I tell her she doesn't have to, she just has to be quiet, play quietly, rest and stay in her bed. She makes it for about an hour. I keep hoping she will fall asleep. But, she doesn't.

It has made for some cranky days and long evenings. She had a melt down with the babysitter last night. And, her potty accidents have increased.

Oh, I am just not ready for this yet . . .

Not a Silent Sunday

This is just something I want to remember, so if I don't post it, I will someday forget, because my brain gets to full of other stuff.

I put EG to bed and we sing two songs. "I pick, I pick," she says. But, it is always the same two songs. Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and Jesus Loves Me. All the while she is playing, twisting, stroking, running her long hair on the back of her head with her fingers.

When I am done singing, she leans up and we give kisses to each other. She then asks me, "You sit on the couch, in the middle?" To which I reply "Yes, I sit on the couch in the middle." Then she asks "You hang up my towel?" (Her towel from her shower.) "Yes, EG, I did hang up your towel. Thank you so much for reminding me. That is such a big help. You go night, night. If you sleep all night, in your crib, you get a juice box in the morning. I love you so much." EG, "I love you so much too."

Does she have to grown up . . .

Musical Beds

We, and I say we because the majority of us, have been sick since Sunday. Nature Girl throwing up, me, Boop and EG with head colds etc. Not to mention we watched the third Star Wars (or the 6th).

All that to say, is, no one is sleeping where they are suppose to be sleeping. Which always cracks me up, because before EG came along, it was imperative that everyone slept where they were suppose to sleep. Meaning in their own beds.

Now, I just want sleep. No matter where or how.

So Sunday looked like this: me, EG and Nature Girl on the couch. It was a progression from about 10 until 2. Then around 4/5ish Boop ended up in bed with daddy. Little Mama stayed put.

Last night looked like this: me and NG in my bed, daddy on the couch, Little Mama and Boop in the big girls room and EG stayed put.

I just needed sleep, as did everyone else, and I didn't care how we (I) got it. I still don't feel well, Nature Girl is still throwing up but at least we all got some much needed sleep . . .

Sleep

I have never been a big sleeper. I like sleep and 7 or 8 hours a night is good for me. But, I have never been one to lie around in bed in the morning. I have never taken naps in the afternoon (not that I haven't wanted to, even when pregnant or with a newborn in the house). And, usually, when I wake up in the morning, I do not roll over and go back to sleep.

But, lately, I can go to bed at 10PM and on one occasion slept until 8. (Because the kids let me.) The alarm goes off and I do not care. I tell myself "if by 6:15 I am not back to sleep, I will get up." And every time I go back to sleep.

Now, I don't even bother to set the alarm. I have been waking up about 6:40. I tell myself "you have 5 more minutes" because I want to get my quiet time in. This morning I fell back to sleep!! It is incredible to me. If anything , I use to just lay there for 5 minutes. NEVER going back to sleep!

I have always been jealous of people who could sleep so readily. Jealous of those who can lay down and actually take a nap. Or wake up in the mornings and roll over and go back to sleep. (I never did either thing in college.)

I don't know if it is age. Or my body just trying to "catch-up" on years of lost sleep. But, if this keeps up, I just might try a nap and see what happens. . .

Nap Time

This is how EG's nap time goes:

Go potty.

Put on diaper.

EG says "love you mommy."

I say "ohhh, EG mommy loves you to" and I give her a big squeeze.

We sit in the rocking chair with three books. I no longer read. She flips through the book asking questions. These books end up in crib with her. Along with the six other stuffed animals and three blankets.

Sometimes a stuffed animal has to sit with us. She use to sit in my lap when we rocked. Now she has to sit next to me.

After we "read," I sing her Rock-a-Bye Baby twice. Sometimes in a silly way. Sometimes softly and then she will say "louder mommy, louder."

She dives into her crib and requests that, not only do I cover her, but I cover her Abbie, her Build-A-Bear rabbit that is on loan from Nature Girl.

I say "nigh-night, EG. Love you."

She says "Good night mommy. Love you."

Then I shut the door.

She now continues to yell two or three times "love you, mommy." And I continue to say back two or three times "ohh, EG mommy loves you too" . . .

Sleep Issues

So, this is how EG has been sleeping the last few days:

Waking at the crack of dawn.

Not wanting to take an afternoon nap. Much screaming and crying involved.

Not wanting to go to bed. Much crying and screaming involved.

Waking up in the middle of the night, crying.

I know it is a phase. And someday, when she is about 40+ years old, she will want to take a nap and sleep until noon. I know I do . . .

Sleepless Nights

When EG wakes up in the middle of the night and is inconsolable, I go in and get her. She grabs her blankets and her two loveys and I put her in the twin bed, in her (Boop's) room with me.

For the last few nights, EG has been restless. She squawks and kind of cries. I can hear her rolling around, trying to get comfortable. Last night she never did get comfortable and after about a half hour of listening to her kind of whining and fussing and rolling around, I went in to get her.

She was sitting in the middle of her crib, with her blankets in hand, just waiting for me to come get her . . .

I Love EG This Much

So, we are on night number, well I am not even sure anymore, of a 15 month old who doesn't want to sleep in the middle of the night. You would think by baby number 4 I would have this all figured out. But I don't and obviously no child is ever the same!

The night before she slept all night and truly yesterday was such a great day. I LOVE being well rested. (So does the rest of my family, LOVE me being well rested that is.) So, last night I had high hopes.

Around 1AM I hear it start, the screaming and crying for mommy. Daddy and I chat for about 10/15 as to what to do. Finally, I grab my pillow and blanket and head for EG's room. I pick her up out of the crib and lay her down in the twin bed with me. I have a plan.

After about 45 minutes of her rubbing my face and playing peek a boo with me, she finally falls asleep. Kind of lying by my side but on my arm. I figure, maybe, just maybe, I can sneak out and she can sleep in the twin, with the baby side on it. Well, I must have fallen asleep because when I awoke, it was already light outside.

I slipped out of the bed and went to take a shower, it was about 7:30AM. At about 8ish, I was going to check in on her and make sure she wasn't in a place where she might roll out of the bed. And as I headed to the hallway, out and around the corner comes EG. Apparently she woke up and with out a sound managed to get out of the bed and decided to come see what was going on.

I had to laugh! I am not really sure what I am going to do with this one. She is definitely unique. In so many different ways . . .

Sleeping Arrangements

We (meaning me and EG) had one of the worst nights sleep we have had in awhile. I am not complaining but I will say my body has gotten use to sleep. Anyway, it got me thinking as I traveled from one sleeping place to the next - at any given moment no one is really in a bed they are suppose to be sleeping in.

I have always been a big believer in everyone needs to learn at an early age where they sleep and when. Babies weren't suppose to sleep with us. And I have never laid down with a child to get them to sleep (unless we were traveling or they were sick.) Now, we do just about anything to get sleep. With Boop, I slept occasionally in a twin bed with him. With EG, I did it pretty frequently. Especially when she was in that stage of waking up at 5AM and not really going back to sleep unless she was in my bed. I am such a light sleeper that I never ever worried about hurting either of them. Most times I would just lie there thankful they were asleep. :)

On any given night I can be in Boop's room with EG. In the girls' room with all three kids. On the couch or possibly even in my bed. Boop is in the girls' room. When he was sick he was in bed with daddy. Daddy sometimes (very rarely these days) sleeps on the couch but usually in his bed. Mickey is on the couch sometimes but usually in his room. The girls have been consistent in that I don't think in the last 8 months they have slept anywhere but in their beds.

When I put the big kids down at night, I try to tell them where I think I will be in the middle of the night in case they need me. "If I am not on the couch, check in my room. If I am not in my room, check in Boop's." At about 3 this morning, I kind of hoped we never had a late night emergency. I don't know if we would know where every one is . . .

Sleep Blissful Sleep

For all the things we have going on around here these past couple of weeks the biggest one, for me any way, has been the lack of sleep. It was getting increasingly worse at night. EG has been waking up every hour, hour and a half and just basically nooshing. I would pop her off when I felt like she was asleep and her little lips would make this big round "o" and she looked like a little bird looking for a worm from her mama. Now in the middle of the day it is one of the cutest things a mom can witness. Three, four in the morning for like the 3rd time isn't quite so adorable. As with a lot of things when your a mom, you know when it is time to make changes. When you just can't do a certain something anymore. For every mom it is different for each set a circumstances. I had had enough of the middle of the night feedings. I knew it was needed to maintain my milk supply and give her extra calories so I continued. (I have since added two additional feedings during the day.) But over the course of the last couple of days, I knew I had had enough. I was ready for the tears and the crying. I know you have to teach babies to sleep. Some are easier to train then others. Nature Girl and EG the hardest. Little Mama and Boop the easiest. We started on Monday or Tuesday night. I was just so completely exhausted and in every fiber of my being in the middle of the night I knew I was done. It was time. The first night I was so tired I would hear her cry (nothing frantic just mad). I actually fell asleep and would wake up like a half hour later and she was quiet. (She is in Boop's room and I am on the couch. Actually I start out in her room and after the first time she wakes and I nurse, I go sleep on the couch. Can't sleep in the room with her anymore. She is so noisy and active.) The second night I ended up getting up with her twice. The second time she was more frantic and I just couldn't bare it. But she went right back to sleep after I fed her. Last night she woke up at 11:30PM and I nursed her. I then went on the couch and I never heard from her again. Yea!!!!! I am not going to kid myself into thinking we have some kind of pattern here because I no better. But, I was just so thankful to sleep. I even dreamed!!!! I am not giving up. I am on a mission now, for the two of us. Sleep, blissful sleep . . .

Sleep Swap

Our nephew has come to stay with us for a little while so we have had to rearrange our sleeping situation just a bit. It has been a long time coming anyway. EG has been in our bedroom for the past 7 months. Longer than any other baby. It is definitely time for her to sleep in her crib. The biggest reason we have not moved her is because we were just not sure what to do with her. On nights that daddy's alarm goes off at 4AM he has been sleeping in the front room/Coco's room/guest room. Now our nephew has the front room and daddy has our room, EG and I have moved into Boop's room and Boop has moved into the girls' room. All temporary. The plan is to have EG and Boop share a room for awhile. The crib is in there. And eventually move her into the girls room. (Plus, I thought by now she would be sleeping through the night :) But right now my concern is Boop crawling into the crib with EG in the middle of the night when she cries. He would want to "help." So last night Boop and the girls were up until 10:30. Reading, giggling, talking. That is a half hour past my bedtime! I think Nature Girl and Boop were still awake when I finally went to bed!

We are enjoying having our nephew here. He has been a huge help already. The kids absolutely adore him. And follow him everywhere. Poor guy. But he is used to it, though. He is second in a large family. So he knows what it is like to have little ones around. Right now he is in the process of stripping the wallpaper in the school room. And he has watched Boop while the girls and I ran to the mall. Oh, and have I mentioned having another adult to talk to during the day. Daddy likes having him around. So far he has gone to the movies with him and is trying to get a fishing trip together. Tonight they might go watch the baseball game at a wing place. And he has help with the lawn. We just might get use to having him around . . .

Rejoice with Me

It is amazing how 5 hours straight of sleep can affect a person :) Yes, I had 5 HOURS of sleep last night. I needed it so bad!! I was smart last night I went to bed right after I put EG down about 9:30. Daddy came in around 11 and woke me to feed her one last time. We both looked at her and she was sleeping so soundly that I thought we would have an "experiment." (I love peeking in the bassinet and watching her sleep. She looks so sweet and peaceful.) The results couldn't be any worse than what had gone on for the last couple of nights ;) So, I just let her sleep. Finally, at 3:45 I woke up and was amazed! She was still asleep. I decided because of nursing issues etc. (and the fact that maybe we could all "sleep in") I would wake her and feed her and maybe she would stay asleep until 7:30ish. So I did. I put her back down and she wiggled a little bit and went back to sleep. Unfortunately I am a very light sleeper so around 6ish she started to wriggle but she never cried or fussed so I just watched for a little bit. The next thing I knew it was 7:28. God gives you what you need just when you need it. And I am VERY thankful for that!! It is amazing how some sleep can brighten the day . . .